Perkembangan kepribadian, salah satunya ditentukan oleh Pendidikan

Perkembangan kepribadian anak sangat ditentukan oleh pendidikan yang diterima dari orang tuanya di rumah. Rumah merupakan tempat belajar yang pertama bagi anak. Sekolah merupakan lembaga kedua yang memberikan andil besar dalam perkembangan kepribadian mereka.

Untuk itu pada usia awal anak masuk sekolah, peran hubungan antara guru dengan murid sangat menentukan. Guru di sekolah mengambil peran orang tua untuk melakukan transfer of knowledge, value and attitude. Maka guru di sekolah memiliki peran yang strategis dalam pengembangan kepribadian anak. Dengan demikian usia anak pada masa kanak sampai ke tingkat remaja akhir berada di dua wilayah yaitu rumah dan sekolah.

Oleh karena itu agar anak mengalami perkembangan kepribadian yang sehat, menurut seorang tokoh psikologi Elizabeth B. Hurlock seharusnya pendidikan yang didapatkan anak selaras atau sinkron dan terintegrasi antara pembinaan di rumah dengan di sekolah.

Hal ini bertujuan agar tidak terjadi kebingungan yang pada akhirnya terjadi split personality (kepribadian ganda).

Elizabeth B. Hurlock memaparkan beberapa alasan tentang pentingnya lembaga pendidikan dalam pengembangan kepribadian.

1. Pertama, semua anak harus bersekolah, terlepas dari pilihan pribadi mereka masing-masing.

2. Kedua,pengaruh sekolah sangat signifikan pada tahap awal pembentukan konsep diri pada anak.

3. Ketiga, selain di rumah,anak menghabiskan lebih banyak waktu di sekolah daripada di tempat lainnya.Sedangkan ketika anak mencapai usia remaja, mereka menghabiskan lebih banyak waktu di sekolah daripada di rumah.

4. Keempat, sekolah memberikan kesempatan kepada anak untuk mendapatkan perkembangan dalam kehidupan,dan sekolah akan mempengaruhi kepribadian dengan menawarkan mereka kesempatan untuk meraih "kesuksesan".

5. Dan kelima, sekolah memberikan kesempatan awal yang ril kepada seseorang untuk menilai dirinya dan kemampuannya secara realistis, bebas dari intervensi orangtua.

Sekolah mengajarkan kemandirian kepada siswa agar tidak bergantung kepada orang lain, karena selama di sekolah orang tua tidak diperkenankan untuk mengatur kehidupan anaknya. Dirumah, orang tua yang menjadi contoh anak dalam segala kondisi, yang membimbing dan mengarahkan anak untuk memiliki kepribadian yang baik dan sesuai dengan pribadi sang anak.Dalam memecahkan permasalahan dan menjadi teman dalam suka dan duka.Pribadi anak tersebut akan terus berkembang dengan dukungan pendidikan di sekolah. Semoga anak-anak kita menjadi anak yang berkepribadian hebat.Semoga bermanfaat...

salam,

dwh

Ara@smile_dinawh: Seberapa Besar Peranan Pendidikan Moral Sebagai D...

Ara@smile_dinawh: Seberapa Besar Peranan Pendidikan Moral Sebagai D...: Melihat dan berinteraksi dengan anak-anak jaman sekarang, terkadang mencengangkan. Dari sikap ataupun perilaku dan reaksi mereka terha...

Seberapa Besar Peranan Pendidikan Moral Sebagai Dasar Pendidikan

Melihat dan berinteraksi dengan anak-anak jaman sekarang, terkadang mencengangkan. Dari sikap ataupun perilaku dan reaksi mereka terhadap apa yang terjadi di lingkungan sekitar mereka. Terkadang terlalu berlebihan, terkadang sangat cuek dan tidak mau tau dengan apa yang terjadi. Gambaran yang sangat memprihatinkan bagi generasi dimasa datang. Sebenarnya apa dan siapa yang salah ? Kita tidak tau, dan tidak dapat saling menyalahkan. Karena memang kita tidak tau secara pasti dan jelasnya…..

Menurut saya pribadi, hakikat pendidikan dasar adalah juga membentuk budaya,  moral, dan  budi pekerti, bukan sekedar menjadikan anak-anak kita pintar dan otaknya menguasai ilmu teknologi.  Apabila halnya demikian, kita tak perlu heran kalau masih melihat banyak orang pintar dan otaknya cerdas, namun miskin moral dan budi pekerti. Mungkin kita terlewat untuk menginternalisasi nilai-nilai moral saat sekolah dasar dulu. Mungkin waktu kita saat itu tersita untuk menghafal ilmu-ilmu “penting” lainnya.
Bukan berarti bahwa pendidikan kita mulai melupakan “Budaya”, yang di dalamnya mencakup moral dan budi pekerti. Menyadari bahwa pendidikan tak dapat dipisahkan dari kebudayaan, karena dalam proses pendidikan, anak diajarkan budaya dan nilai-nilai moral.

Menurut pendapat saya idealnya pada sekolah dasar, anak-anak diajarkan sistem nilai moral melalui empat aspek, yaitu Menghargai Diri Sendiri (Regarding Self), Menghargai Orang Lain (Relation to Others), Menghargai Lingkungan dan Keindahan (Relation to Nature & the Sublime), serta menghargai kelompok dan komunitas (Relation to Group & Society). Keempatnya diajarkan dan ditanamkan pada setiap anak sehingga membentuk perilaku mereka.

Seperti di Negara Jepang misalnya, pendidikan sekolah dasar  selalu menanamkan pada anak-anak bahwa hidup tidak bisa semaunya sendiri, terutama dalam bermasyarakat. Mereka perlu memerhatikan orang lain, lingkungan, dan kelompok sosial. Tak heran kalau kita melihat dalam realitanya, masyarakat di Jepang saling menghargai. Di kendaraan umum, jalan raya, maupun bermasyarakat, mereka saling memperhatikan kepentingan orang lain. Rupanya hal ini telah ditanamkan sejak mereka berada di tingkat pendidikan dasar. Disana empat kali dalam seminggu mewajibkan bagi siswa untuk melakukan pekerjaan-pekerjaan rumah tangga. Ia harus membersihkan dan menyikat WC, menyapu dapur, dan mengepel lantai. Setiap anak di Jepang, tanpa kecuali, harus melakukan pekerjaan-pekerjaan itu. Akibatnya mereka bisa lebih mandiri dan menghormati orang lain.
Kebersahajaan juga diajarkan dan ditanamkan pada anak-anak sejak dini. Nilai moral jauh lebih penting dari nilai materi. Mereka hampir tidak pernah menunjukkan atau bicara tentang materi. Siswa tidak ada yang membawa handphone, ataupun barang berharga. Berbicara tentang materi adalah hal yang memalukan dan dianggap rendah disana.

Keselarasan antara pendidikan di sekolah dengan nilai-nilai yang ditanamkan di rumah dan masyarakat juga penting. Apabila anak di sekolah membersihkan WC, maka otomatis itu juga dikerjakan di rumah. Apabila anak di sekolah bersahaja, maka orang tua di rumah juga mencontohkan kebersahajaan. Hal ini menjadikan moral lebih mudah tertanam dan terpateri di anak. Dengan kata lain, orang tua tidak “membongkar” apa yang diajarkan di sekolah oleh guru. Mereka justru mempertajam nilai-nilai itu dalam keseharian sang anak. Saat makan siang tiba, anak-anak merapikan meja untuk digunakan makan siang bersama di kelas. Yang mengagetkan saya adalah, makan siang itu dilayani oleh mereka sendiri secara bergiliran. Beberapa anak pergi ke dapur umum sekolah untuk mengambil trolley makanan dan minuman. Kemudian mereka melayani teman-temannya dengan mengambilkan makanan dan menyajikan minuman.

Hal seperti ini menanamkan nilai pada anak tentang pentingnya melayani orang lain. Saya yakin, apabila anak-anak terbiasa melayani, sekiranya nanti menjadi pejabat publik, pasti nalurinya melayani masyarakat, bukan malah minta dilayani.

Di balik itu semua ada sebuah perjuangan panjang dalam membentuk budaya dan karakter.  Ibarat pohon besar yang dahan dan rantingnya banyak, asalnya tetap dari satu petak akar. Dan akar itu, saya pikir adalah pendidikan dasar. Dengan dasar filosofi yang diajarkan adalah bagaimana menaklukan diri sendiri demi kepentingan yang lebih luas. Anak-anak diajarkan untuk memiliki harga diri, rasa malu, dan jujur. Mereka juga dididik untuk menghargai sistem nilai, bukan materi atau harta.

Mungkin di negeri kita banyak juga sekolah yang mengajarkan pembentukan karakter. Ada sekolah mahal yang bagus. Namun selama dilakukan terpisah-terpisah, bukan sebagai sistem nasional, anak akan mengalami kebingungan dalam kehidupan nyata. Apalagi kalau sekolah mahal sudah menjadi bagian dari mencari gengsi, maka satu nilai moral sudah berkurang di sana...

Semoga dapat bermanfaat bagi kita para orang tua....

Inspirasi by "friends"

The process of Indigenous Traditional Wedding Ceremony Central of Java Indonesia

In Java, especially Central Java, Indonesia as well as in other places, in principle marriage occurs because the decision two people who fell in love. Although there are also marriages that occur because parents arranged marriage that occurred in the past. While older people argue over ancient Javanese proverb : “Witing Tresno jalaran soko kulino” , that is to say : Love to grow as accustomed.

In Java, where family life is still strong, a marriage would bring together two great families. Therefore, according the prevailing custom, the two beings who establish love to tell their families that they have found the perfect match and ideal to be husband or wife. Traditionally, consideration of acceptance of a suitor by the “bibit, bebet and bobot. What is a “bibit, bebet, and bobot ?”

Bibit : background means having a good family life.
Bebet : the prospective bride, especially men, are able to meet the needs of the family.
bobot : both prospective bride is a qualified person, both mentally and educated enough.

If both parties parents and family have agreed, the next step is:

Proposal / Application
Usually that is the candidate applying for the groom. In the past, parents prospective groom sent a member of his family to court. But now, for the parents practical man can directly propose to the woman's parents. When it is received, will instantly be discussed further steps until the marriage ceremony.

In the Java implementation of customary marriages, the prospective bride has officially is the work, the men helped. How the implementation of the marriage ceremony, whether simple, moderate or large party and invited many guests complete with entertainment, in reality it would depend on the budget available. At this time both parties are more open to discuss the budget.

Which party is more busy parents prospective bride. The things that must be done is:
1. Kin invited to discuss and prepare the whole marriage process. Traditionally formed a committee consisting of family members and close acquaintances and each has a clear task. It is also important to determine the responsible party about the dishes, catering which to choose. The selection of catering experience essential, must be a good and responsible and fulfilling its service.
At present, the practical considerations, there are families who have a show, all the ceremony handed over to the Event Organizer.

2. Installation Bleketepe and Tarub
The day before the wedding ceremony, the bride's parents' home and bleketepe Tarub fitted front door of the front page. Created Tarub decorated arch consisting of various Tuwuhan, ie plants and foliage that have symbolic meaning. Left and right gate installed fruiting banana trees have ripe bananas.
Meaning: The husband will be the head of the family in the middle of society. Such as banana trees can grow well anywhere and harmony with the environment, this new family will live a happy, prosperous and harmonious with the surrounding environment.
Wulung pair of cane, sugar cane reddish, a symbol of steadiness heart, this new couple will build their family wholeheartedly.

Cengkir ivory, small coconut yellow, symbolizing both the hardness-strength of mind, so that the couple solemnly bound in a common life of mutual love.
Various kinds of fresh foliage such as banyan, mojokoro, alang-alang, dadap srep, is the hope that this couple live and grow up in a family that always survive and prosper.

Woven palm leaves called bekletepe hung digapura doorstep, this is meant to ward off evil spirits and all disturbances and also be a sign that the home is being performed the marriage ceremony.
Special offerings held before installation Tarub and bekletepe, consisting of: rice cone, various kinds of fruits including bananas and coconut, assorted side dishes, pastries, drinks, flowers, herbs, tempeh, buffalo meat, coconut sugar and a lantern. (depending on who had the job, whether or not such offerings).
These offerings symbolize the petition in order to get the blessing of the Lord, God and the blessing of the ancestors as well as a means to resist temptation evil spirits. The offerings are placed in several places where the nuptial procession held as the kitchen, bathroom, front door, under Tarub, the street near the house etc..

Ceremonies before the wedding

splash of water
Spray from the origin of the word flush, meaning bath. The day before the wedding, both prospective bride cleansed by bathing ceremony called Spray. Prospective bride's parents home bathed, as well as the groom also bathed her parents home.
The things that need to be prepared to Spray:

1. Site preparation to spray, if done in the bathroom or the back or side of the house or yard.
2. A list of people who will come to bathe. By tradition the bride besides parents, grandparents bride, some elders. Are invited to join their bathing is more mature, you should already have grandchildren and have a reputation of a good life.
3. A number of items are needed such as: a water bottle, bucket, chair, flower setaman, linen, towels, jugs etc.
4. Offerings to spray, there are more than ten kinds, such as a rooster.

5. The family bride sends a pan of water to the groom's family. Water is called holy water perwitosari means the juice of life, the water mixed with some kind of interest, which is placed in a container which is good, to be mixed with water to bathe the groom.
6. The last to bathe the bride is Pemaes / makeup, the prospective bride watered down with water from a jug. When the jug was empty, Pemaes or a designated elders, slammed the jug on the floor and said: "Wispecah pamore". means prospective bride is beautiful or dashing now ready to get married.
7. Cleansing ceremony is complete and the prospective bride to wear batik motif Grompol and covered his body with batik motifs nagasari, led back wedding chamber. Prospective bride's daughter will be scraped by Pemaes / makeup.

Shaving ceremony
Shaving means small hairs on the face of the bride carefully scraped by Pemaes. Bride's hair is dried and then smoked with hundreds / fragrant incense. Start to apply makeup prospective bride. Face makeup and hair bun in accordance with the pattern that has defined marriage ceremony.
When he finished, the bride dressed in a nice kebaya and batik fabrics prepared and Sidoasih sidomukti motif, symbolizing he will live a prosperous and respected by others.
That night, my father and mother be bride gives to her last mouthful, because starting tomorrow, he is under the responsibility of her husband.
Offerings for whittling with spray offerings. So as a practical matter, all the offerings brought into the room spray aisle and become offerings to shave.

Midodareni ceremony
At the ceremony which took place at night midodareni before Ijab / blessing and found (in the Java language called Panggih) the next morning, both parents and their groom the groom, escorted by close family, home visiting the parents of the bride.
Be bride after wedding makeup in the room, looks like a stunner widodari, angel, goddess of heaven.
According to ancient belief, that night the bride was accompanied by a beautiful goddess of heaven. That night the bride should get yourself a room and can not sleep from 6 pm to midnight. Some elderly mother to accompany and provide valuable advices.
Family of the prospective groom that a woman, who came midodareni eve, should visit the prospective bride who was dressed in a beautiful, ready to get married the next morning.
Custom fit, there's room special offerings for the wedding ceremony midodareni, there are eleven kinds of food and goods; except that there are 7 kinds of other stuff.

Room outside wedding ceremony
Midodareni eve, parents and the prospective bride's family, received a visit from the parents and family of the prospective groom. They sat in the house, become acquainted and dine together. Prospective groom is also coming, but he was not allowed in the house and just be sitting the porch front. He was just treated to a glass of water to drink, not to eat or drink another. It is said to exercise patience a husband and head of the family.

Handed over or Peningsetan
In midodareni ceremony, can be handed over or in the Java language is often referred to as peningsetan. (In the old days, before the night is done peningsetan midodareni). Prospective parents and family of the groom give some stuff to the parents of the bride.

Peningset

Peningsetan of the thinner, meaning that bind tightly, in which case the commitment to a marriage between the two parties and the sons and daughters of parents bride will be a family (called besan in Java).

Giving it be : A set of beautiful betel leaf as a symbol of hope that genuine salvation. A set of clothing for the bride, including some batik cloth that symbolizes happiness. Can not miss a stagen, belts, large white cloth and long, as a sign of strong determination. Some crops such as rice, sugar, salt, cooking oil, fruits.

as a sign of adequacy and prosperous life for new families . A pair of wedding rings for the bride and groom.

On this occasion, the groom handed over a sum of money, as a contribution to the implementation of the marriage ceremony. This is only a formality, since dues money is given in advance.
After dining together and become acquainted, the whole family entourage dismissed the groom's parents to come home. They need to prepare for tomorrow is an important implementation of a marriage ceremony includes religious wedding, the bride brings both traditional ceremony and so on.

Quarantine (in the Java language called "Nyantri")
When the groom's family group home from midodareni ceremony, the prospective groom was not invited to come back. However, the groom nyantri (quarantined), then he left the prospective in-laws home. Of nyantri previously been discussed and approved by both parties.
Here's how to order: The prospective groom's parents through a family spokesman told the prospective bride's parents, that the groom was not invited to return and hand over responsibility to the parents of the prospective bride.
After the family home, in the middle of the night he was invited into the house to eat, can not see his future wife and then ushered into the bedroom to rest.
Nyantri implemented for practical standpoint, given the morning he had to be dressed for the implementation of the wedding ceremony. Also for the security of marriage, both bride already was in one place

Implementation Ijab / Blessing of Marriage
Consent / blessing of marriage is the most important thing to legalize a marriage. Consent or marriage performed in accordance with both the bride religion, can Islam, Christianity, Catholicism, Hinduism, Buddhism, Confucianism.
Preparation for the blessing / Ijab, to be really careful, so smoothly and safely.
Ijab after completion, meaning that brides are valid as husband and wife.

Ceremony "Panggih" or Matching Bride.
Traditionally ceremony "Panggih" or bring home bride carried bride's parents.
At the appointed time, the groom escorted by his brothers except his parents that should not be present at this ceremony, the bride arrived in front of the house and stopped in front of the door of the house. Meanwhile, the bride is escorted by his brothers and his parents followed, to welcome the arrival of the groom and the house next door stops. In front of the bride, two little girls called "patah” (clamp) brings fan. Two young boys or two mothers, each bearing a special flower arrangement called "Kembar mayang” (Virgin twins). A mother bridesmaids men forward and provide "sanggan" to the mother of the bride as a sign of respect for the solemnization of marriage. Sanggan was a banana wrapped in banana leaves and put on the tray.
At the time of the ceremony Panggih, Virgin twins were taken out of the house and dumped the street intersection near the house or near the course of the marriage ceremony, meaning that the ceremony runs safely and there was no disturbance of any kind and from any party.

Betel Leaves throws (in Java called " Balangan Suruh")
Both bride and meet face to face at a distance of about two or three feet, they stopped and deftly tossed the stuffed betel leaf ties with whiting and tied with string. This ritual is called "Balangan suruh".
Both bride earnest throwing betel leaves with a smile, accompanied by all those who witnessed the excitement. According to ancient belief, betel leaves have the power to ward off evil spirits. So by throwing betel leaves, the bride and groom bride is absolutely true, not false.

Being Ritual Seeds (Java called "Wiji Dadi")  The groom stepped on a chicken egg to burst with her right foot, then the foot is washed by the bride with flower water. Meaning: households headed by a responsible husband with a good wife, would generate a good thing as well, including the descendants.

Ritual Kacar Kucur or Tampa Kaya (received results of operations of the groom).
A bride and groom to walk hand in hand with his little finger toward the front of the aisle / krobongan, the place where the ceremony the reception (Java called "Tampa Rich") was held. Ceremony "Kacar Kucur" illustrates: husband gave all his earnings to his wife. In this ritual the husband gives to the wife: bean, soy, rice, corn, nasi yellow, dlingo Bengle, several sorts flowers and of money metal with amount even-numbered. Wife receives wholeheartedly with a piece of white cloth which is put on a piece of old mat that is placed on his lap. It means the wife will be a housewife good and careful
Note: In the first period, Tampa Kaya ritual, Dhahar kembul etc., is done in front of the existing krobongan senthong middle (Living room an ancient house that was used to make offerings). At present, the ritual still held despite the marriage ceremony was held in the halls of the meeting or hotel. Wedding decoration chair behind a wood carving is shaped krobongan. This is to follow the times and while still preserving the tradition.

Ceremonies

Ritual "Dhahar Klimah or Dhahar Kembul" (eating together with one plate)
In the presence of the bride's parents and close relatives, the bride and groom eat together, feed each other. Groom makes three spheres of yellow rice with side dishes such as fried eggs, tempeh, soy, shredded, chicken liver. Then he scooped his wife, then his wife feeding her husband dressing, topped with sweet tea together. This symbolizes that from now on they will use and enjoy with what they have.

"Mertui or Mapag Besan" (pick up the parents, the groom)
Both parents pick up the bride groom's parents in front of the house (marriage halls to pick her up in front of the room where the event ritual) and let them enter the house / room where the ceremony, then they walked together to the place of the ceremony. Mothers walked in front, fathers accompanied from behind. Both parents of the groom seated left the bride, bride's parents sit on the right bride.

Ceremony "Sungkeman" (please blessing of the parents)
A bride and groom do sungkem the parents of both parties. At first the parents of the bride and then the groom's parents. Sungkem is a sincere form of respect to parents and elders.
At the time sungkem (saluting the squatting position, both hands and kissed knees worshiping the requested blessing), keris groom used first and restraints removed by cosmetic, after completion sungkem, dagger worn again.
Parents with emotion sungkem receive homage in the form of the son of his daughter and at the same time also gave his blessing so that they lead a life of harmony, peace. Without saying the words, actually the parents of the bride are giving symbolized blessing of batik cloth worn truntum that pattern, meaning Have the considerable fortune during life. Both parents also use a big belt whose name sindhur with image patterns with curved lines and curves, meaning that parents cautioned her two children so always be cautious, wise in real life in this world.

Ceremony "Sindhur Binayang"
After Dadi Wiji ritual, the bride's father walked in front of the bride and groom to the bride in front of the seat to krobongan, while the bride's mother walked behind second bride, the bride and groom's shoulder and covered with a cloth sindhur. It symbolizes, the father shows the way to happiness, the mother's favor.

Weigh (weighing)
Both bride together the bride's father sat down lap. After pondering for a moment, the father said: Same weight, meaning father loved both, equally, are not distinguished.

Ceremony "Tanem"
Furthermore, the father of the bride and groom sit in a chair aisle. It to strengthen its approval of the marriage and gave his blessing.

Ceremony "Bubak Kawah"
Bride's father, after the convocation ceremony, drinking salad degan / coconut krobongan front. His wife asks: How Sir taste? Answered: Well fresh once, hopefully people at home are also fresh. Then she joined the drink tasted a bit of the same glass, followed by son and last child bride. It is a symbol that the bride segeradikaruniai petition descent.

Ceremony "Tumplak Punjen"
This ritual is performed by parents who marry off his daughter for the last time. Tumplak means to pour or provide all, parents Punjen is a treasure that has been collected since their marriage.
In this ritual, the parents are happy, krobongan front, giving her ("Punjen") to all the children and descendants. Symbolically to each given a small parcel containing spices, yellow rice, coins of gold, bronze and copper etc..
By holding Tumplak Punjen, parents want to set an example for their descendants, that they sudahpurna task and that the next generation is always menyukuri gift of God and able to perform his duties properly.

Ceremony "Swap Kalpika"
To exchange wedding rings as a sign of love and attachment to the legitimate husband and wife.

Wedding Reception

After the marriage ceremony the whole series was completed, a reception, where both the new bride, with both sides flanked parents, received congratulations from the guests.
In the reception, attendees are welcome to eat food that has been provided, while a social time with relatives and acquaintances. Sometimes, before the reception starts, held classical Javanese dance drama performances suitable for marriage like a musical or dance Karonsih Pergiwo Ghatotkacha, which depicts a loving relationship women and men.

With this dish can hopefully add to the discourse on our cultural traditions ...

regards,
dwh